No parachute

“The bad news is you’re falling through the air, nothing to hang on to, no parachute.
The good news is there’s no ground.”
~ Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche

I can’t remember a winter like this one. It’s been good, stressful, and scary – sometimes all at the same time. My husband and I are faced with a set of challenges I don’t think either one of us fully anticipated (despite many hints) with regard to our career directions.

My life has changed so much in the past 18 months after getting laid off. And that’s really a good thing. One thing this time has given me is the opportunity to identify what it is that I don’t want. That has proven to be useful, like a form of muscle testing. When faced with a choice that doesn’t support my highest good, I am likely to experience a strong internal response that rejects the choice.

Late last year, I debated about shelving my Reiki and life coaching business indefinitely, because I felt this pressure again to have a regular job with steady income. The minute the thought crossed my mind, I felt sick to my stomach. I’ve never had such a strong reaction when thinking about any kind of career choice, and it took me by surprise. I realized I needed to reset my priorities to make my business my primary career. Whether I’m providing a treatment or consultation to a client, or teaching Reiki classes, I’m in my happy place. It was a relief to finally feel I could commit to them, but scary as well.

My contract job is up at the end of March. There’s a possibility I can stay on as a freelancer, which would work out just fine for me. I’m pretty good at what I do, but I want more flexibility with my schedule. I’m in over my head trying to do it all, and it’s been affecting my health. As my friend Cecilia wryly observed the other day, “Yeah, what about that rest/balance stuff you teach to others?”

Meanwhile, as all of this was unfolding, my husband found out his job role is being eliminated. So, now we are both faced with possibly being without steady income after March. Talk about falling through the air without a parachute! However, he now has the unique opportunity to realize his potential by taking on a new business venture.

My husband is ridiculously smart. What most people see is maybe a tenth of what goes on in that head of his. Now he has the chance to take all of that innate talent and intellect, and create something amazing. I’m so excited for him, even if it means we have to live on ramen noodles and cat food to make it all happen (just kidding.) I know it sounds strange, but I was actually glad in a way that this happened. A job loss can be devastating if other options are limited, but it can also be a catalyst for positive change and growth.

Right now, a lot of our energy is going towards generating momentum that will carry us well past the end of our current jobs. This is the time when we both need to fully step into our power. It’s all still a bit uncertain, but I’ve been pleased at how often the universe has been supporting these changes. When I saw the Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche quote, I laughed because that’s truly how I’ve been feeling. Hurtling through space with no real ground in sight, but I somehow feel like it will be okay.*

*When I’m having one of those days where I start fretting or feeling doubtful, just remind me I said this. 🙂

(Photo credit: TheFadedPast on Flickr)

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